How do we deal with Grief?

“So you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again.
The sun is the same in a relative way but you're older,
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death.”

Dealing with the death of a loved one can be a hard thing for us to handle. It can lead to a subconscious state of grieving. It's not something we can initially prepare ourselves for; it's a process that takes a lot of time for healing. I can personally tie the feeling of grief with the lyrics above from Pink Floyd's song Time. Grief can take ahold of us more than we can even fathom, like a riptide. We fall into a redundancy where we're running after the sun. We are lost as grief takes ahold of us, day and night. We might always ask ourselves when we will feel normal again, why it happened, or what we could've done about it, and just overall feeling hopeless and shattered. Grief passes with time and the feeling may still be relevant, but we'll be able to watch the sun set in a better peace of mind once we reach the end our healing process when we know that we're okay. 
__________________________________________________________________________________
I feel like I can tie this in with my own personal experience dealing with the death of a loved one. The topic of death is hard to approach, but the grief result may be an inevitable process. Grief may be a bit of a grueling process, but there comes a time where we have to brush ourselves off and solider on forward with our lives just as that person would want us to do. We must embrace the grieving process.

On December 1st, 2016, I lost my girlfriend of almost three years to a car accident. It's something that still doesn't make sense. There aren't any words to describe it, but there are always questions I can't help but ask myself. I get stuck in the loop of: What if I took a second out of my homework to get her food while she was at work just one last time? (Had actually dropped my wallet in her car, so I ended up paying for it anyways). What if I had met her in the morning to greet her with breakfast before school? Never would've happened, right? It's best to stay out of the void, as there's no real guarantee, since it's in the past and time must be taken to appreciate the moments we had together rather than dwelling on it.
  
With that in mind, we can only do so much about the inevitable. There's no use in tiring ourselves out trying to grasp onto something we have no control over. We may stay up for days and nights just staring at the sky, but they're not coming back. Unless they're in our reoccurring dreams and the smallest things you see on a daily basis, they are always with us. Grief can weigh us down like layers of hotel blankets, but that's okay because healing isn't a race. The clarity doesn't come over night, but there's still a lighthouse behind the fog. 
   
To sum it all up, the best way embrace grief is to put yourself back into your routine and to healthily cope with what is going on. Life's unfair, but we still have to live our lives. Remember the memories, but never forget what you felt during that moment. Use that to go forward, not hold you back. Embracing grief is a personal journey in itself that we may have to find answers to on our own. 

Comments

  1. Cincere EngramJanuary 28, 2019 at 5:59 PM

    Everyone deals with grief differently, but the best way to deal with grief is to turn that grief into a source of motivation that you can use in your daily life. Death is a very traumatic thing and grief can bring out many personalities in someone that were never imaginable.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ashley SarkodeeJanuary 30, 2019 at 6:25 PM

    I agree with your concluding statement "Embracing grief is a personal journey in itself that we may have to find answers to on our own". One person may grieve completely differently than the next person. Some may accept the fact the love one has passed meanwhile others simply cannot fathom the idea of death itself. You cannot be taught how to grieve, it just happens naturally. Even though death is inevitable, we have to embrace ourselves for it.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Caitlin Doughty - Why are you afraid of death

Doughty created a video about common fears of death and how to find comfort in them. The way to get over death is to pinpoint the fear. One of the common fears of death relates to the fear of regretting experiences or not experiencing certain events. This fear is why I’m scared to die at a young age. Being able to look back on life and remembering experiences I have gone through and thinking about how full my life was is the goal. As silly as it sounds, I want to be able to tell stories of silly times I spent with friends or the moments of impulsivity that creates a story. Knowing that I have roughly 60 years of life to go and that I’ve lived ¼ of my life already, adds to the fear of dying young. In those years to come I know I will experience some great and horrible things but I still want to experience them. Dying young would end the cycle of being able to experience new moments and having stories to tell. It sounds selfish but I look at every moment has if it could be a story t...
Read more

Pros and Cons of Immortality

Immortality is ability to live forever. People who are immoral will never have to experience death because they have an eternal life. Thinking this, some people might think that is something they want because we will have an unlimited amount of time. We won't have to worry about death because it will never come. However, being immortal isn't as good as we make it out to be.  When making decisions, there are consequences in the decisions we make because we are picking one path and letting go of the other. You won’t get to experience the other path because you chose not to follow it and it messes with the one you did. With immortality, Immortals won’t have to make difficult decisions in their life because they are aware that they have an unlimited amount of time. People who are immortal can pick to do one thing and have the time to also achieve the other because they will live forever. The problem with this is that there is no significance people who are immortal have the abil...
Read more

confusing souls for personality

When talking about death it is not uncommon to mention souls and believing in souls. In A Dialogue on Personal Identity and Immortality written by John Perry, the characters Gretchen Weirob and Sam Miller are in debate relating to the proof of personal identity and sameness of soul. Weirob states her opinion that there is no personal identity for the reason that there is no proof stating we hold one soul. Miller disagrees saying that there is no proof of human bodies holding multiple souls. I agree with Miller and his argument from the first chapter of the book. There are ways to identify people and objects by characteristics. Without the characteristics then how can someone identify a person or object with no visual aid? Agreeing with Miller, the idea of having one soul in our body for our entire life is engraved in our minds. Having Weirob question that idea leaves me with more questions. A part in the book that stood out the most to me is the argument by Weirob saying “...t...
Read more